I Shouldn't Be Resentful

I called my mom the other day to wish her a happy birthday. She was in good spirits and we had a nice conversation. She asked me about my pregnancy and due date, etc. (I've told her my due date before but I have to repeat things many times for my mother). Then she said how much she wants to try to get up where I live when the "Big Event" happens. (She doesn't drive further than a few miles from her home--and that's a good thing). I said, yeah, I'm trying to figure out what we're going to do when the time comes and I need to go to the hospital--we'll need someone to come help out with Handsome Man. She then reiterated that she hoped she could come and be there and help out. (Side note: I don't know how much actual help my mother would be...but the sentiment was nice) But then after I hung up the phone I started thinking....That's really nice but where the F*ck were you when we brought home Handsome Man?? I'm pretty sure we went a couple of months before she even met her grandson. She wasn't in any rush to get up here then... and then I think when she did finally meet him it was because Mister and I drove down there. I know, she doesn't drive, yada yada, but if she is willing to make arrangements (to get a ride with my sister or brother in law or one of my nieces) to get herself up here when the baby is born, then....well, I'll say it again: Where the F*ck were you 3 years ago? Sure we'll need even more help now because I'll be recovering from childbirth, we'll have an infant AND a toddler. And I will not say NO to any help that is offered, just out of spite. I know I shouldn't feel resentful but I do. Even though I didn't give birth to Handsome Man, he was our First Born, and I just wish my mother would have acted as excited for his homecoming as she is acting about this baby on the way.

Again, I know I shouldn't complain. My mother is showing interest in my life and my family and that is a plus. She is expressing a desire to come and be involved and that is saying something for her... Maybe it's just hormones making me crazy.