Sunday, June 12, 2011

On a Lighter Note

Thank you, everyone for your supportive comments. Thank you, especially Shelby for the insight on how IEP's work--it really does help my anxiety levels. I guess I just feel like I had to swim through wet concrete to get where I am with this process, I worry that starting over will mean a repeat. Maybe it wouldn't be that hard the second time around. I'm sure most cities have their act together than the one I live in. Deep sigh.

We still don't have any job news. The job in SF we were hoping for didn't pan out, so now we're down to the out-of-state one. (Though Mister is still applying to some more companies nearer to home). The out-of-state company is flying him out in a couple of weeks, which seems like ages away. I try to remain as Zen-like as possible, though some days it is impossible--my body belies what is really going on deep inside and suddenly (like the other night from about 2 a.m. to 5 a.m.) I find myself in the midst of a anxiety attack. Double Deep Sigh.


Here are some pics of my kids at our Stepping Stones class. (This is the preschool-like class where parents attend with their kids, and younger siblings are welcome.) For the first time since Grace was born, the past few weeks Handsome Man has been wanting to play with his sister. The other night I even caught him rubbing his sister's head and giving her little kisses. He can't wait to see her in the morning (he usually wakes up before everyone--and we try to keep him quiet and out of Grace's room until she wakes up.) So--despite my fears that his jealousy and anger since we brought Grace home would be life long--Handsome Man loves his sister. She has been completely enamored of him from day one, but I was worried it would never flow in the other direction. Thank you God, I think that things are going to be ok. I can't even express how much this means to me. I was raised basically as an only child (my sister being 16 years older than I and going off to college and living abroad by the time I was 2)... I always wished for a sibling, and when we adopted HM I always wanted for him to have a sibling. So, despite the many on-going challenges I am still dealing with with Handsome Man, this one thing seems to be turning around and I couldn't be happier. These two children will be in each other's lives (God willing) longer than I will be in their lives on this earth. I think having a brother or sister is such a gift. So there you go, my gratitude for this week, despite all the other s.h.i.t.!!!

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