Thursday, April 1, 2010

Turn Around!

Okay, so this baby is still breech. Yesterday I went into the hospital where they tried a 'Version'--which is where they try and manually manipulate the baby into turning heads-down. Let me just tell anyone out there who may need this procedure--it is not pleasant. Though, I'm sure it is nothing compared to labor. First they pumped my full of a drug that was supposed to relax my uterus. It is actually an asthma medication. How it was discovered it was useful for relaxing women's uteri I have no idea, but whatever. Let's just say it makes you feel like craap! I was shaky and jittery and just sort of icky feeling. Like having waaaay too much coffee. But without the fun. Then the good doctor (not my doctor Wunnerful but another doc from the practice, whom I've been seeing a lot lately) tried (while I was hooked up to a fetal heart monitor and the ultrasound tech was standing by to keep checking position) to moooooove that baby. Um. Let's just say it was painful. I tried as hard as I could to not seize up and constrict my muscles (which would have been counterproductive to what they were trying to do). I had to do a lot of breathing--the type of breathing I would imagine I would be using if I were actually in labor--and try my best to "go to my happy place" while it was happening. Mister was there and he was being very supportive. Unfortunately, it just didn't work. Once the doctor announced he was stopping, I started crying. I really hoped it would work. Because this means of course that the only way this baby is coming out is by C-section.

Many friends have suggested acupuncture or chiropractic or even standing upside down in a pool. Let me just tell you that after what they did to me yesterday, I would wager that if that couldn't get the baby to move, then needles in my little toe aren't going to do it either. Not to sound negative or anything, but seriously--apparently the baby's butt is firmly planted in my pelvis. Pretty stuck.

So I've got another STUBBORN little child on my hands. God help me.

I am disappointed that I will not be able to go through the rite of passage of childbirth. There is a part of me that wants to be angry at my body for failing me once again--but really, I can't go there. I mean, if anything, I owe my body a lot of thanks for getting me this far. Not only did I finally conceive, I have had a pretty uneventful and healthy pregnancy. I even survived and recovered from a terrible car accident at 6 weeks pregnant. I've been feeling mostly good this whole time. I've got a robust, healthy baby growing inside of me. He or she is just in the wrong position. It is not my fault. It is not my body's fault (other than being slender and not providing a lot of space, I suppose?).

I see the doctor again on Monday and he will schedule the C. Do you think it will be rude or weird of me to request my Doctor Wunnerful to do the C-section?

On another, random note: Today is April Fool's Day. On this day 4 years ago I was informed the baby I was carrying was not a viable pregnancy. And it wasn't a joke. It was one of the worst days of my entire life. I guess, when I think about where I was then, and where I am now, having a C-section isn't such a big deal, if it means I get a healthy baby at the end of it all.

But still, I'm a little freaked and a little sad, too.


Tracy said...

I'm sorry. For what it's worth, I spent most of my pregnancy totally committed to a vaginal birth. In the end, I had a c-section, and it was wonderful. It was actually a very peaceful, calm experience.

I'm not trying to talk you into anything, I just want you to know that for me, I couldn't have asked for a better experience and in the end, I'm kind of relieved that I didn't have to go through the pain of childbirth (especially since it was best for my children.)

s.e. said...

My two cents- I loved my c-section and even talked about how awesome it was while I was laying on the table. Don't be too scared. It can still be an amazing experience and you will give birth to a wonderful child, your child either way.

Jericho said...

Boo for breach babies---but you made a good point to be thankful you are where you are. No matter what you'll do great and peanut will be worth it all!!

Peeveme said...

You do have a right to be mad But I think you have perspective. Healthy baby right?